Why I'm Not a Military Man

Yesterday I went paintballing with my coworkers. Yes, I'm as surprised as you are. I actually had a very fun time. But I realized that I would make a horrible soldier. Amazingly, I didn't a) soil myself, b) cry a lot, or c) surrender like,

well, you know.

Most of the time, I hid behind rocks and trees. I even walked across the fields in the open at times. The reason I won't make a good soldier is that I didn't know what to do when I got shot. I basically just stood there and got hit. Nope, I didn't run for cover, nor did I fire back. I just stood there like a deer in headlights. I think that would make me a bad soldier.

So when it comes to it, I wouldn't hesitate to volunteer for the army if my country needed me. But would my country want me? Probably not.

Dramatization of me

playing paintball