So someone I know told me of his terrible experience with the elementary school field day. George (name changed) was number one in his elementary school power walk. He was champion for years. A badge of triumph, if you ask me. He continued until the judges suspected that he was not really power walking. They made him walk past him, inspecting him to see if he really was power walking. No, George wasn't because both feet were not on the ground at both times and hence he was running.
Scandalous, I know, but I got this from George's own mouth.
And then I thought of what people will remember from my life, and the autobiography that I know will practically write itself. It will be entitled: "Bake it at 375 Degrees with a Pound of Love: the Chad Riding Story" I've had this in mind for several years. The cover page will have a picture of me in front of a beautiful rainbow and cloud filled sunset and objects representing my accomplishments in life.
Chad's Life Accomplishments, as taken from "Bake it at 375 Degrees with a Pound of Love: The Chad Riding Story"
1. Nobel Peace Prize AND Nobel Literature Prize before the age of 30
2. Perpetual Motion Machine
3. UF SPA club presidency
4. Cutest baby in the world
5. Bringing Britney Spears back from the edge
6. Inventing a spoon combined with a straw and a fork
7. The George Foreman-Chad Riding grill and pretzel maker
8. Losing to George Bush at Jeopardy (the categories were rigged, Alex Trebek had it out for me)
9. Saving Christmas from Terrorists
10. Inventing a Food Better than Chocolate
10. Inventing a Food Better than Chocolate
5 comments:
wow... that will be really inspiring for the rest of us. I think you need a bigger picture of you on the title.
i've already pre-ordered my copy with amazon.
my autobiography will be called "kat: i hardly knew me".
Chad, I have to say. I think my pep talk worked. This is one of the best posts. 10 being the best post you've ever written, this gets a 9. Keep up the good work.
Definitely at least a "9"
Ha, I actually have to write a 20 page memoir for one of my classes this semester. I haven't determined a title yet, any suggestions?
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